I saw a video on the internet the other day that was ridiculous, and very disturbing. A man became so impatient while waiting at a gas station, that he jumped out of his vehicle and attacked the man who was at the gas pump in front of him. It was a horrible scene, and he severely hurt the man he attacked. But then, realizing his rage had been caught on video, and that his license plate was also recorded, he went back to his vehicle, got in, and drove away. No doubt his tirade-caught-on-tape earned him a trip to the county jail at least.It all seems so simple when you are the one witnessing someone else come unglued. If the man could simply walk back to his van and drive away with no gas after the tirade, why didn’t he just walk away and leave before? Impulsiveness can sure get us in a heap of trouble. It can be spending, speaking, screaming, squealing tires, or any number of poorly thought out actions, but our impulsive actions can often land us in hot water.
I have endured several of these stupid moments in my life, but there is one that stands head-and-shoulders above them all.
I was driving a truck for my dad's construction company, and I knew I would have to swing wide in order to get the equipment trailer I was towing around a turn in a tight intersection. I was very careful not to intrude into the path of any other drivers as I made the turn, but some "jerk" honked at me anyway. It really ticked me off! I was so careful but some idiot laid on his horn anyway! So without looking, I thrust my 17-year-old impulsive middle finger straight in the air out my window as I turned to yell out a few expletives for emphasis.
As I turned and made eye contact with the bum who honked, I caught the surprised look of my parent’s preacher who was honking and waving at me...just because he is so stinking nice! Yep, Scott the preacher. There it was...that stupid finger out there in all its glory. His surprised look quickly turned to a sadistic smile and I knew there was no way I was going to convince him that this little incident should be kept just between the two of us. Ugh!! We didn’t even have cell phones back then, but my parents knew of my deed before I even got back home. My dad was more than happy to take "corrective action."
How do we get a handle on our impulsive thoughts, statements, and behaviors? It begins in perhaps a surprising place...humility. Yes. It begins with humility because many impulsive behaviors are rooted in a kind of "independent thinking" that often stems from pride. We are living independently of God and his guiding hand, instead of "walking humbly with our God." (Micah 6:8) We are not walking "in step with the Spirit" (Galatians 5:16-26). And we are not considering the impact of our statements and actions on others.
This kind of independence is not healthy because it demonstrates that we do not believe fervently that we need to live in relationship with our God and with our fellow humans.
God’s desire is that our estimation of ourselves would be assessed in relationship with others (Romans 12:3-5). This theme is again addressed in the context of humility when Paul references the perfect example of concern for others found in Christ Jesus (Philippians 2:1-11). I am working through this part of my decision-making process right along with you. Impulsive thoughts are normal, but our first thought is often not our best thought.
Often times we judge others impulsively, much like people judged Jesus, but we do not humbly rein in our thoughts and take a more thoughtful and Christ-like approach to them. If we allow our judgments to stick, it changes the way we treat another person. All the while we may have not actually had any personal conversation with them at all concerning the ideas we have about them in our heart and mind. We may even reject thinking that we are guilty of making these kinds of impulsive judgments. We may imagine that all of our beliefs and thoughts about others are thoroughly thought out and based on excellent information and observation. This is not humility.
One of God's favorite admonitions throughout Scripture is that we be very humble in how we judge others. Surely even a little dose of humility will make a dent in our habits of impulsivity.
- Don McLaughlin
